Respect the Difference

By Liz Sharkey

I’m back studying at the moment – Cert III in Individual Support. I was pleasantly surprised how much I’ve learnt in the Communicate with Diverse People and Communicate Effectively units. They’ve changed the way I speak with clients and I’ve identified some of the bad habits I had.

I like to think that my clients can trust me and feel safe with me. Trust that I will listen respectfully to them and work with them to achieve their goals, safe in the knowledge that I will not judge them, their body or their life choices.

Two things occurred last year that made me seriously question my attitudes and beliefs, and the way they are unconsciously reflected in my clinical practice. In both instances, it was my children who led me to challenge myself.

The Black Lives Matter movement and specifically the protests around Aboriginal deaths in custody made me aware that my understanding of the experiences and struggles of First Nations people are embarrassingly limited. I am a white, middle aged woman, educated in the Catholic school system in Australia. It took several discussions with my 20-year-old son to highlight just how ignorant I was and led me to undertake some self-education on the subject (more about that later).

Following the Melbourne lockdown, a man I knew began transitioning to her authentic self. Again, this led to some truly enlightening discussions with my kids over the dinner table about the trans community. Turns out my kids are way more educated on this topic than this married, straight, middle-aged woman.

So what does all this have to do with massage therapy and the way we deliver our service?

Massage Therapists treat clients with different cultures, race, religion, gender or sexual preference to our own. We have a responsibility to show respect to our clients regardless of any difference.

Making Changes

Communication is a huge part of what Massage Therapists do. Communication is not just the words we use but how we use them. It is our body language and facial expressions. Communication can also be the images we choose to represent us on our websites and social media.

I needed to reflect and re-evaluate my communications with clients.

I had clients who couldn’t speak English at all. It’s a multicultural society in Australia. In this situation, body language and Google translator is always excellent to make things easier. Let’s say, if you point up, means harder or higher; point down means softer or lower. If you nod your head means yes or ok; shake your head means no. (But if the client is Indian, you better double verbally confirm because they shake their heads in both situations just look slightly different.) We might need some imagination and creativity when we use different languages.

Eva* (I’m from Taiwan, not China, not Thailand. Even though we might all look the same with black hair and yellower skin, but we need to speak English to each other.)

The first thing I looked at was the social media posting I was doing. I realised that 99% of the images I used were fit, middle aged women who looked like they had just walked out of the beauty parlour. To be honest, not one of my clients looked like the people on my ads.

To change this, I’ve made a conscious decision to post pictures of “real people” when I produce social media content – people that more reflect the clients I see on my table. That means photos of people with imperfect bodies, different coloured skin, old, young, and gender diverse.

I challenge you to do the same.

My intake form was next. What type of language do I use in that? The biggest red flag was the male/female question. Why do I even need to ask that? Well, Medibank Private specify that it is a requirement as part of record keeping, but if that’s the only fault they can find on my intake form, then I’m happy to wear it. I no longer ask my clients their gender and am considering asking their preferred pronouns.

I looked at the questions I ask and how they may be interpreted by someone from a non-English speaking background. I simplified the language and words on my intake form. Turns out some of the language I was using was more to make me look educated and smart than making it easy and relevant for clients.

Then I looked at myself and how I interact with my clients.

When I start working as a massage therapist in Australia. It was 10 years ago. I used to say yes sir, yes madam to clients. But in Australia, clients take advantage for our polite attitude, asking for sexual service or not respect our industry. Now I call clients by their name, not sir, not too friendly.

Yuka (grew up in Japan)

Communication

I wasn’t aware that body language varied so much depending on cultural background.

More and more I take my cues from my client and read their body language. For example, I have always used eye contact as a way of engaging with my clients, but I’ve learnt that in some cultures, direct eye contact can be seen as disrespectful or rude and neurodivergent people may also avoid eye contact. I now modify my eye contact to what my client is doing.

Effective and respectful communication is not always about the words used but how we interpret the verbal and non-verbal information we are presented with.

Where I recognise that a client comes from a different background to me, I focus on the client and what is important to them. I don’t expect them to be a spokesperson for their entire culture or religion. I’ve proven that we are never too old to learn new things and allowing our clients to share their story will only add strength and trust to the client/therapist relationship.

I provided reflexology to a senior Middle East lady while she was sitting outside instead of a private room. She didn’t speak too much English and I didn’t  understand their culture a lot. Based on my knowledge and her  full coverage of her hair and other body parts, I think I can’t reveal her body too much during the treatment. So I use a towel to cover her calf while I pull up her skirt. In the end, she was quite happy about it.

Eva*

Learn More

There is a plethora of resources on understanding diversity. I started with some of the resources provided by Reconciliation Australia¹, which promotes and facilitates respect, trust and positive relationships between the wider Australian community and First Nations people. Queensland Health² also have some excellent resources.

RELATED ARTICLE: Cultural Safety for Massage Therapists

So much of our focus with professional development is “hands on” where we refine and learn new skills and techniques to use on our clients. How much focus do we give to how we interact with clients?

Professional Development Reflection Idea: Write a reflection on your biases and understanding of diversity.

Between my Cert III course and listening to my kids share their life experiences, understanding of social issues and what they are being taught about diversity at school, I have placed an essential tool in my massage toolbox that demonstrates respect for all of my clients.

References

1. Reconciliation Australia – Print and video resources
2. Queensland Health Aboriginal and Torres Islander Patient Care Guide

Thanks

Ed: Thank you to Eva and Yuka, and to the other massage therapists who offered to share their story.

About the Author

COVID gave Liz Sharkey the chance to take stock of life.  She’s cut back on her massage time to go back to TAFE to study the Cert III in Individual Support (Aged Care).  She’s keeping her TAFE teachers on their game, especially with the anatomy and physiology classes, but is loving the course and looking at service provision from a different perspective.

*Name changed